And I am, for sure, the mostly-likely-to-win the “Most Likely To Misspell In A Comment Box Award” too.
But lately, I’ve noticed a trend forming. A conspiracy possibly. Something bordering on creepy. Invasive. Kinda sinister.
It’s the Word Verification people.
It’s like…well.. they are stalking me.
You know what I mean, right? The little box that pops after you comment and hit “submit” and forces you to type in some lame a$$ word before you can continue?
I think it’s supposed to weed out the aliens from the humans, but now I am getting paranoid. It’s like…they know me.
I feel like these invisible Word Verification people…are watching. Like they know my every move, what makes me tick, my quirks.
PARANOID you say? Noper-do-poopy-do (sshhh..is someone there? Is there’s someone behind me??)
No wait! Don’t hit the back button yet.
I have proof. Here’s what I mean. Here’s a sample of what the nosy WV people have been taunting me with lately:
Ponzi: Was NOT. It was just a simple office pool! I swear!
Avoid Swamies: Why? Do you know something I don’t? Every Swamie I’ve encountered lately have been fine, upstanding citizens.
Catlink: Yes, yes, there was a big orange stinky one on my back step yesterday. How did they know that? Is Catlink the cat version of a spy network? I think the Catlink p*ssed on my step too. Jerk.
Guest: Well no sh*t Sherlock.
Leek: Yeah? So? What about it. It wasn’t my fault. I just “held it” too long. Who knew I was gonna sneeze. Plus, I had on dark pants. No one was the wiser.
Woofles: Ok, this one is just too much. How did they know my 7 year old has been heckling me for a dog for the last three hours, hmmm?
Wolf Side: *gasp* This one gave me goosebumps. How did they know I am “cycling” right now?? Huh? Huh! Actually my hubs uses the term “Pit Bull” during this precious time-o-the month..but who cares. There both in the dog family. Pass the tamps please.
imix: ok.Busted. So I mix my Metamucil with vodka. So what? A girls gotta do what a girls gotta too. If I can’t properly take a dump, I may as well be jolly about it. How’d they see? Window peepers??
It’s like these people know. I’m tellin ya.
Excuse me while I check my wall clocks for hidden cameras.
And one of my kid’s toy cameras has been lingering on my dining room table for days.
Looks mighty suspicious to me.
A person can’t be too careful, ya know.