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For those of you who don’t know…I have got a BIG problem. It’s called….MY BUTT. I have wwaayyyy too much Junk In My Trunk. An overabundance of Ghetto Boo-tay. So much in fact, it’s pissin me off, undermining my confidence, and making me pant like a wounded walrus every time I climb stairs.
It sucks. And I have no one to blame but ME.
BUT, never fear, The Smart People are HERE! Thank goodness I am blessed with Smart Friends. People who care about me and want to see me succeed. The next few weeks/months/years my goal is to lose 50 pounds. Lose the weight, get healthy, eat better, and improve my life. Did I mention I want to live to see my kids grow up too?
So there’s that too.
So to accomplish this goal (and because I am a lazy, procrastinating toad when it comes to exercise) I’ve signed on with a local gal who is a personal weightloss coach. She is great. She also scares me a little…which is a good thing. So as part of my coaching every Monday me and the 6-foot Blond-Amazon-Nutrition-Guru-Coach Amy Kenow, head off on some new adventure. These adventures all revolve around me getting healthy, making better food choices, and whipping my fat arse into shape. Good times, baby.
So now we are on week 4 and apparently I live in a box because exercise-wise, there is soooo much I’ve never done! Last week I met Miss Amy at Snap Fitness and started things off with what is now my newest, favor-tist, piece of exercise equipment; The Stability Ball. Love.love.LUV this thing! Talk about easy but effective exercise.
It’s also good for old farts like me that sit like the Hunchback of Notre Dame over a computer all day. Drape your back across this Stability Ball and within seconds your spine will go “Ahhhhhhhh.”
I immediately rushed out to one of the Big Bloated Chain Stores and bought one. Now it is a nightly occurrence for me and my kids to fight over The Ball. And it’s not uncommon for me to work-out with a 40 pound kid draped across my knees. Kinda like a warm little Medicine Ball with fruit-snack-breath, that constantly chirps “my turn! my turn!”
Speaking of Medicine Ball, I tried those too. Very cool. A great way to enhance any workout. Use them during cardio lunges, Step aerobics, or even on Mr. Stability Ball. Definitely another “Becky’s Pick” for exercise stuff
Oh btw…yes, that IS a picture of me above. Yup, uh-uh. Amy whipped 100 pounds off me in one session and gave me big hooties. She is Magic Coach. Told ya she was good.
Speaking of hooties…this is one thing I tried and DID NOT like. The infamous Five Pound Hula Hoop. Don’t kid around with this thing people. Good Lord. I tried it (unsupervised) and I am pretty sure on the first swing-around I fractured both nips. Damn that hurt. Pass on the Hula From Hell.
All-in-all it was a fun session and I feel I am really coming around. I am a bit stiff today, but not nearly like I thought I’d be. I thought I’d have to yell for a tow rope going up and down steps today, but I actually feel pretty darn good. And the organic cherry topper on the soy ice cream was when Amy looked at my food diary and said, “Cool. That looks pretty good.”
Got any weightloss tips for me??? Share ’em if you got ’em!
Run, Forest, Run!
Much luck to you. Oh, and I am sure your bootie isn’t that big!!
Mary Aalgaard says
This is an excellent time to commit to healthy living – just as the holidays are in full swing and the butter is flowing. I brought home a big fit ball from my sister’s house. I had a smaller one that just the kids used, and the piano students used as a drum. This bigger one is fun to lie on and stretch. I am a member at the Y. If you ever want to check out a Group Power class, call me. First stop is free.
Marina Reede says
thanks for another humorous post…and good luck! i’m working on this stuff too! i needs to get get me another ball. used to use them years ago. and, yes, my daughter loved playing with it all the time! 🙂 i love staying up late but need to quit eating so much…fruit? have a great week! 🙂
….and now I want a big ball!! I’m intrigued that it made your spine go ahhhh:)
Good for you! I need a kick in the (rapidly expanding) butt–I think a scary trainer might just do it!
Ummmyeah, I’m still in a Turkey/stuffing/pumpkin pie induced coma as well. I am dreaded my Monday weight-in. I think the scale will shriek “get off me! get off me!”
Thanks for the chuckles and best of luck to you in your journey. I’m a p90x grad, though you’d never know it by the feedbag I’ve had on my face all week. Serious food coma! 🙂