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I don’t want my readers to think I am a psychotic cheeseball, but I really do admire the hell outta Scary Mommy.
She’s raw and real, and her posts have a tendency to reach inside my head and make realize I.Have.Issues.
Plus her new blog design is HOT.
She recently did this post called Saying WHEN.
This was a great post, give it a read if you have time. Once again she got in my head and made me go “hmmmmm”. Here was my comment:
Thanks for being real. I feel better knowing it’s not just ME. It used to be I was thrilled and full filled by volunteering and Chairing local projects. Two years later I am tired, drained and these “projects” don’t seem to want to let me go. I love cheesy 80’s movies and I guess I would liken my situation to Melanie Griffin in Working Girl. As I try to go down new paths, grow as a business woman, and work on a fledgling business (beside work full time and raise a family) my “old life” and these ANCHORS keep trying to pull me back in. Yes, the guilt is huge. A sense of Obligation is hanging over me like the Goodyear Blimp. But the reality is, my time with these projects/events is done. I need to keep my corner of the world all neat and tidy. Thanks for the post Jill. I don’t envy your position with Lucky, but I know it’s the right thing to do. Good for you for having the balls to know when to say “when”.
Is there something in YOUR life that needs a big, fat, “WHEN”??
Awww! I stumbled upon your blog somehow and was so surprised to see this! Thank you! So glad that post resonated with you. I really went from being miserable to so much happier. I want to make a point of stepping back and evaluating every few months now. We need to! 🙂
Spot ON, Shannon! You may be “Part Deux” to this “Saying When” Post!
A suggesttion – make a list of all of the activities you are in involved in both professionally and personally. Rate them favorite to least favorite. Review them and identify those that give you the least fulfillment or opportunity to open new doors to growth. Look at the time committment of the three that you have identified as least fulfilling or with the least potential (usually these are the things that you started doing years ago because at that time they were your favorites or had the most potential) and you are just continuing to do them because you can’t say “WHEN”! Eliminate just one of the three and DO NOT replace it with something else. After three months without that commitment, eliminate another. Make an effort to eliminate one per quarter. Ues that time to do something positive, work out (did you know playing outside with your kids is a workout – why not do both at one time!). When people approach you with new opportunities simplly thank them for thinking of you and tell them that at this time you cannot commit to any new projects. Offer to be a one-time brain dump, an advisor should they run into problems but be careful not to let these roles become more than this. And of course, don’t be taken advantage of – often we want to be “nice” and “help” but think about what service you are providing – would others provide it for free? They are asking you because you are good at it, because you know what you’re doing, because they know you will get it done. Commit time to yourself and family not another project that will get you nowhere.