Life Lessons

Anti-Adulting Days | When you don’t feel like trying, what do you do?

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Adulting

There are days  when I Just.Can’t.Even.

I don’t want to write.

I don’t want to do Social Media.

I don’t want to be perky and happy.

And I certainly don’t want to adult.

I call these days “Anti-Adulting Days.”

These are the days when I wonder what the heck I was/am thinking/doing. Am I doing the right things? Am I heading in the right direction? Wouldn’t it be easier to just.not.give.a.crap?

Typically these blue moment, or periods of self-doubt, happen at night. When I’m tired, overwhelmed and pissed off. At no one in particular either.

By the next morning, I’m back to bursting with confidence, energy and sureness of purpose. I’m 100% certain that I’m doing the right thing.

It’s not easy being an adult.

No one ever said success would be. But what I can offer you is some tips and thoughts for those times when your spirits are low and the Stinkin Thinkin is threatening to bring you to your knees.

1. Go to bed! Wouldn’t that be the obvious choice? It’s nighttime and my body/brain says DONE! But, I think the key is to go to bed in the right frame of mind. Don’t lay your head on the pillow running the “Worry List” through your brain. Call it a night by first thinking of four things you are grateful for. That’s it. Hit the rack with the Gratitude Attitude.

2. I heard this quote years ago,  Sometimes in the muck of stuck, I forget that I’ve gained some ground.

Instead of beating myself in the head about what I didn’t do, I need to review what I have accomplished and celebrate my successes. No matter how small. I have a “Victory List” on the wall of my home office. This 11×17 sheet of paper lists all the things I done/seen, experienced/accomplished. Things that give me the warm fuzzies about ME.

3. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. The path I’ve chosen is a journey, not a destination. I’m a female. I want it all, and I want it in five minutes or less. Reality is, I’m also a farmer. Planting seeds and waiting for them to sprout and grow. And that takes time.

4. Take back control, a.k.a tell people to quit “shoulding” on me. Sometimes I feel stuck because I feel trapped. Surrounded by “shoulds” and “have tos.” Trust me, I am fully aware it would be easier to reach my goals on the well-traveled path. But everything I want to accomplish is more like hacking through the jungle. It’s exhausting. But I also wouldn’t do it any other way.

In this case, it helps me to remember that I have choices. I can quit if I want to. Or I can change what I’m doing or how I’m doing it or where I’m doing it or when or with whom. This is MY life. MY reality. And I create it, dammit.

5. Time moves forward. It helps me to remember the quote my Gramma always used about unpleasant things; “This too shall pass.” And it always does. I know one thing for certain: whatever crabbies or self doubts I’m feeling today? They won’t last.

It’s all a Journey. Take a small step forward. Then repeat.

What do YOU do when worry and self-doubt is threatening to derail you?