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Mama, you are enough. Stop doing that to yourself. You are enough
They were encouraging words that I had just shared with one of my coaching clients.She had been lamenting that she’d gotten “nothing done” this week and her business-building task list was still (in her mind) a “mile long.”
“Whatever you did to move forward today…yesterday…last week is enough. YOU are enough.” I said to her. And I believed it to my core.
She thanked me, said she felt recharged, and we ended the call with her knowing if she was to tackle ONE THING that day, it was enough.
Fast forward a few hours, and I found myself on the receiving end of an email that tested everything I had just preached to my client. There was an Author Event in a neighboring town, and I (being a new author) was genuinely interested in if/how I could get involved. So I sent an email introducing myself and my books to the shop owner.
Her response felt terse and prickling with disapproval. I could almost feel her eyes rolling from my town 60 miles away.
We don’t accept books which were printed by Createspace or any other Amazon affiliate. Please let me know who printed your books. If it was someone other than Amazon, I’d be glad to talk to you about Author Fest.
And let me give you some advice. My store is an independent bookstore. Amazon is actively working to put all of us out of business. You may not be aware that sending an email to an indie bookstore with references to Amazon is a strategic misstep.
Wait…what?
In an instant, I wasn’t enough. I was “just another hack self-publisher” (what my brain was telling me—not what she was saying to me), and I wasn’t “good enough” to rub elbows with other authors. Needless to say, it took the wind out of my sails, and I found myself spiraling down a black hole of Pity Party for One.
In her defense—I get it. I worked for an independently owned office product company for 30 years, so I understand how hard it is to compete with The Big Guns. But I also felt that this was incredibly small-minded of this small town book store. Never in my eight years of working with authors and being immersed in the authoring/publishing world was “where do you print your books” EVER a point of contention.
The bigger problem was my reaction. She had every right to speak her truth and hold her beliefs. The real issue was that, in the blink of an eye, I let someone else make me feel “less than.”
And I let my lizard brain spin a story about my talent and work that was SO not true.
It took a few minutes of pouting (and maybe even a few cuss words) before I mentally kicked myself in the shorts and recalled a belief that I’ve been hanging on to tightly for years thanks to the wisdom of Brene Brown.
In my life, unless you are planning on getting off the sidelines and out onto the field to get dirty with me, your criticism will get “blessed and released” and not taken into consideration.
I could have let this shop owner whittle away at my already fragile self-doubt, but I chose to spin it into a teachable moment. Not everyone will like you. Not every opportunity will be a good fit. When someone knocks you down, dust off your cleats and get back into the game. Don’t let the people who don’t matter too much, matter too much.
It’s not personal. It’s just life. You got this!
My Babies Books
I am PROUD of both of these books and both are Bucket List items for me.
Here’s the scoop on MOM BOSSING.
MOM BOSSING: The Freedom to Create the Business You Love is a book filled with resources, personal stories, support, wisdom, & encouragement for any woman desiring to be her own boss. If you are someone who dreams of working at home, is contemplating creating a direct sales biz, or wants to create steady income on your own terms, this book is a fun, fresh, and conversational guidebook and roadmap for success.
“This step-by-step guide shares the truth, fears, tears, and cheers of being a mom who is building a business empire on her own terms.” ~Amazon reviewer
FREElance FREEdom: Creating the Work-From-Home Life You Crave by Rebecca Flansburg
Have you ever dreamed of working from home on your own terms instead of being confined to a corporate cubicle or windowless office? Have you ever dreamed of earning a steady and honest income while still having plenty of time for friends and family? Lucky for you, it’s all very possible. Within the pages of this robust guide is the motherlode of excellent information about working from home and navigating the freelancer lifestyle all rolled into a handy, read-at-your-own pace guidebook. Whether you are looking to pursue a career as a freelance writer, virtual assistant, graphic designer (and more) this book will provide the insight, tools, guides, advice, and strategies that can be applied to any home business.
Please feel free to Follow my shiny new Amazon Author Page too!
