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I read endless articles on what to do to make your blog uber-fantastic-best-thing-since-the invention-of-Uggs. ENDLESS. Really good articles on what NOT to do on blogs? A little harder to find. Then I read a profile on the SITS Girls blog.
By-the-way, if you haven’t seen their new look, I can sum it up in one word…SSSQQQUUEEEE!!! Freakin AMAZING. I have blog envy.
OK, that was many words. AnyWHoo.
They featured a blogger named LaDonna from iFrog. iFrog stands for “I Fully Rely on God”. Very cool. They asked her a question and her answer really hit home. I think it did so because unconsciously, this is how I operate with my blog. Good stuff.
SITS:What is the most important thing you learned through blogging?
LaDonna: As a blogger I have a certain amount of responsibility, I must blog with integrity. To me, that means that I need to not blog when I am angry. A blog should be more than a “venting” place to air all the things you can’t say or won’t say to someone face. If its on my blog I will, or have, said the same exact thing to your face. I won’t shred my family on my blog, that does not mean that all is peaceful in my life. It just means that I feel there is a time and place for everything; once something is release in the “wild” of cyber space there are no take backs, no do-over’s.
She nailed it.
I fully “get” and believe that (my blog anyway) is a place for ME. My thoughts, my words, my stories. I can write what I want, when I want and there’s no Editor telling me “I don’t like your angle”. I like pushing the envelope and bit and talking about things that other bloggers don’t. Goldfish disasters and yoga-carpet-sniffing come to mind. Some day I will even be brave enough to blog about head lice.
But for now, I admit NOTHING.
You don’t like what I write? That’s OK, just hit the “back” button, my friend.
HOWEVER, blogs should not be the supermarket rag of the Internet. As my Dad would say, “you don’t get where you want in life by stepping on the heads of others.”
There are no “do-overs” like LaDonna said. Don’t unleash your fury (in a hateful and slanderous way) on others on your www. Venting? Sure. We all do it. There is fine line between ripping someone to shreds and blogging frustration. And if you do miss the mark, well so be it. It will come back and bite you in the butt though.
I will quote my dad again, “Hateful bad-mouthing just makes YOU look like the a$$hole.”
Well said. Miss ya Dad.
And you should ever have the unfortunate instance to be on the recieving end of a Blogger Behaving Badly, my advice to you is…”Don’t Feed The Trolls”…and refer back to the a$$hole comment above.
What I’d like to know is, have you ever taken down one of your posts/stories because of complaints, upset readers, or just a bad gut feeling?
The Professional Family Manager says
Well said as always!
I agree–if a person can’t say what they write on a blog to the person’s face, they shouldn’t write it. Period. There’s a difference between venting and bashing; you can express your feelings without being mean.
That goes for “anonymous” blogs, too.
I don’t have my full name, where I live, names of my kids, names of their schools, or anything like that on my blog, not because I’m under some delusion that no one will know that I’m the author, but to try to maintain some semblance of privacy for my kids. Recently I wrote about a decision made by my school district that left me scratching my head. Our local paper was tipped off by a friend I know (who works in the media) about my blog, and they published my blog url and that I criticized the school district on it. Now, I was irritated that 1)I didn’t *want* to be quoted in the paper because I want my kids to have their privacy, and 2)they ended up quoting me out of context. My post did not name the school district, the officials involved, or anything…but anyone reading the post from the newspaper link sure got it.
While I preferred to remain anonymous, I was *not* embarrassed that the school district ended up reading it–in fact, I got a phone call from an official I know who works at the district and they told me it was a good, legitimate post. I don’t think they liked that I wrote about it, but I am entitled to my opinion, and I wrote about it respectfully. I think what “saved” me from humiliation is I didn’t write anything I wouldn’t have said to any of their faces anyway…and the bottom line was, the district made a mistake.
Great post yet again!!
Dysfunctional Mom says
Great advice. I have blogged about this a few times. I am still learning and growing every day as a blogger/writer.
I have never had complaints or upset readers, and I’m not sure I’d take a post down if I did; I really doubt it.
I usually try to keep my posts about something other than my frustrations (although that is pretty much inevitable given I’m a mother…) but I always, always try to keep it focused on my own ridiculous life and, although perhaps not always perfect, I do my best to avoid hurtful comments.
It’s true – badmouthing does make you look like an a$$hole. Smart, smart fella, your dad. 🙂
Yup. My blog really used to be a venting ground. I initially had no intentions for it and it became my outlet when I was suffering from PPD. I said some… not so nice things about a SIL and MIL who were making my new mommy experience miserable. SIL found my not-so-secret blog. SIL was ANGRY. Rightfully so. Once I took my blog public I made sure to remove a lot of the nasty from it and I feel a lot better about my blog AND myself.